Famously, Bond, James Bond, likes his Martinis shaken not stirred. His milk too maybe?
Category: Behaviour
Preparing humanity for the Agenda 21 cull
“Carbon emissions,” the global warming religion faithful bleat, “Carbon emissions!” They actually mean “carbon dioxide emissions,” because they are usually bleating about a colourless and
Stay! Stay! Stay!
This is my dog Rover. I have trained him to remain completely still and not react to any distractions. Cool eh?
I’m watching you!
Now then. You can spend a good few moments examining everything in this picture. But. I’m still watching you.
Temperatures falsified to suit the agenda
Why do they keep changing the temperature records? Well, those sceptical of the whole global warming scam know, of course, that without massaging the readings,
Baby On Board
I’ve often seen cars sporting the yellow ‘Baby On Board’ signs and wondered what it meant. Now I understand…
Where are the black dots?
Hey. You can help me. I need to map exactly and precisely where the black dots are. I am finding this extremely difficult. If you
Everyone just wants to be liked and accepted
Trying to please everybody or say and do the right things so that people think we are ‘ok’ is pretty much what we all seem
Naked Men, hanging
Not that I ever have, but had I ever Googled for ‘Naked Men‘ I might have found these, erm, ‘naked men’. These are certainly ‘naked
Where’s the Lingonberry gone?
It’s been 7 hours and 15 days since I made a regrettable and stupid mistake. I did something I once vowed I’d never do again
Can you pass the Engineer’s Test?
Just so you know. Christopher England passes this test with flying colours. Sigh….
As easy as riding a bike
Ah, the 1980s. Back to the days before we had digital photography. In those days you had to wait for your film to be developed
Tower Hamlets tolerance
Somebody put this notice up on the railings of Bartlett Park in the London Borough of Tower Hamlets, apparently. Tower Hamlets has a majority population of strictly
My inequality as an English White
We are told we are equal, and we must fight to stop discrimination and to pretend that we are not all different. I actually find
Mermaids are real
Don’t let anybody tell you that Mermaids don’t exist. They are always there as part of the much bigger picture. Always…
Facing Scottish racism
Are you fed-up being called a racist? I‘m pretty sure you are, especially since you are probably not a racist. Hurtfully, those who shout the
Did John Lennon Imagine it like this?
I wonder if John Lennon Imagined it like this…
Which button will you press?
Ah, but will you pick the button based on its colour or the power it gives you? Do girls go for different powers to boys?
Being a Baby Doll
I work in a lovely cocoon. Sometimes I have to spend times away in somewhat remote areas. In order to pretend I have all my
Polar bears not dying enough for global warming religion
Children love the look of polar bears. They love the stories of how they are left handed, or hide their noses when they hunt for
Crocodiles on the River Thames
Two Crocodiles were sitting at the side of the River Thames. The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, “I can’t understand how
Books are just so pointless and cruel
Surely it’s time to move into an era which stops deliberately using up Mother Earth’s precious resources. Yet, with considerable malice and forethought there’s an
Time to reject kosher and halal cruelty
Since I treat all life equally, regardless of whether or not it has a face, I am happy to eat meat just as much as
This is a journey into my dreams
Can you spot me in this?
Climate change (climate lie, climate hoax)
Klimawandel (Klimalüge, Klimaschwindel) is what this brilliant rap is called. That translates to Climate change (climate lie, climate hoax) for those of us stuck with English
Replacing the short-wave numbers stations
For many many years, short-wave radio bands have been blessed with what are called ‘numbers stations‘. These are radio stations that come on at certain
Click-throughs ain’t the measure of social media
I get it that some folks see the likes of Facebork, Twitter, LinkedIn, or even the lovely Google+ as existing purely to push traffic the
The meeja’s gonna getcha, Nigel
I’m not overly fond of smokers and drinkers. Smokers, as we all know, cannot be trusted, and are usually the smug self-centred sorts who are
Climate Change Reconsidered
A Guest article from Dr. Craig D. Idso NOTE: This op-ed is apparently too hot for some editors to handle. Late last week it was accepted
Get the lay-dees to come in out of the cold
Yeah, for the frigid female. You know who you are! My only concern is how short the power lead is. Having to lay oneself so
Shocking studio sex orgy at Radio Caroline North
We can reveal that there is more to the pop-up Radio Caroline North than meets the eye. Indeed, it’s not just the radio station itself
The truth about my hair
Not unlike the Beatles, every day I wake up, get out of bed, drag a comb across my head. But it still happens. If I
Global Warming laps at my logs
Global Warming means not having to waste so many of our natural resources in order to keep warm, right? Okay, okay, we know it hasn’t
You really must see Facebork’s latest spam
There was a time when we all hated fellow users of Facebork for the non-stop invitations we constantly got to play those stupid games that
When Radio Caroline anoraks lose the plot
Jewish religion anoraks are to blame for confusing today’s radio anoraks. Easter moves about from year to year owing to their fetish for celebrating their
The true hand of god
Maybe. Just maybe. Maybe one day we will evolve beyond a mentality that puts so little value on human life. Maybe we’ll learn to respect
Crazy environmentalists still abusing our children at school
Here’s more on the reaction to the comprehensive report that human-hating environmentalists have infiltrated our schools and are trying to indoctrinate our children with the
Environmentalists’ child abuse is worse than we thought
We really need to be concerned about the propaganda our children are being fed. Actually, we should be concerned about the propaganda we adults are
Humanity can work together for a while
How do we find any ‘good’ from the disappearance of Malaysian Airlines flight MH370? All I can see is pain. In the beginning, spurred on
A nurse’s guide to the apocalypse
We can trust our nursing professionals to be prepared whatever the disaster we face.
This week, go Balearic
Episode 1 of Music Nation on Channel 4 was an interesting watch. Didn’t catch it? Well, it covered the start of the UK Garage music
The annoucement the BBC has been itching to make
You just know they hate humanity so much that they can’t wait for their worst fearmongering to come true so’s they can write this…
Peter Moore speaking of Radio Caroline North
Radio Caroline operates via radiocaroline.co.uk and is the same organisation that has control of the radioship Ross Revenge, the last home of Radio Caroline at
It’s raining sand … again
In recent days a couple of interesting things happened. Firstly, somebody appeared to be scooping up sand from somewhere (Crosby/Formby beach?) and throwing it onto
Radio Caroline Hits 50
I’ve no idea who Rob Hadgraft is. (Apologies for that Mr Hadgraft!) However, Rob has produced a most interesting blog version of the events of
The perils of 3-D printing
Something’s gone horribly wrong with the 3-D printer!!! Something’s gone horribly wrong with the 3-D printer!!! Something’s gone horribly wrong with the 3-D printer!!! Something’s gone horribly wrong
Old offshore radio DJs living for ego strokes
From time to time I watch as these every increasingly old and frail gentlemen shuffle about at memorial services. Some services are held every year,
Protected: Why Radio Caroline North isn’t on air. The horrible truth
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
When will Radio Caroline North start proper programmes?
Radio Caroline North. We’ve all heard the non-stop muzak. We’ve all seen them on the telly pretending they are broadcasting from a ship. But when
#SELFIE Earworm
I get got by earworms. You know, the tune or the song, or the phrase from a tune or song that gets stuck in your
Suzy needs help with shaving
Imagine if you had not just a headache, but an extremely painful migraine headache over which you had absolutely no control. That’s the kind of
Goodbye Butty, we miss you
Wednesday night (March 19th) was a very sad night in my little world. Butty, our big fluffy cat got run over and killed. Back in
It’s the not knowing what happened to Marge
(This is a republishing of an article from January 2013) Until very recently we had two pet cats. Then one day one of them just
We need CCTV absolutely everywhere
The entire country should be covered in CCTV cameras. Their output should be fed back to a huge central processing centre, and from here everything
Choosing to be Gay
I don’t have any issues with gay people being gay or straight people being straight. Sadly, the Middle Eastern religions seem to. In many countries
Our culture of no consequence
People seem to have been surprised at the tactics used by the scum kids (the feral street-wankers) as they destroyed people’s homes, people’s cars, people’s
The art projects that kill
I’m getting somewhat fed-up with ‘art projects’. Mainly because they seem to be able to take huge sums of cash for implementation, whilst more deserving
#nomakeupselfies show that girls are naturally beautiful
So, loads of female humans have been posting selfies whilst not wearing make-up. Now, this is one of those win-win viral things that grew organically
Seven kinds of sex discovered
Research shows that there are seven different kinds of sex. Yes, seven. The 1st kind of sex is called: Smurf Sex. This kind of sex happens
Crowdsourcing to find MH370
Once upon a time when things happened, like an airliner suddenly going missing yet leaving a mysterious trail, we were reliant on mainstream news media
These boots were made for walking
Socks go missing. It’s a scientific fact. They scuttle off to somewhere we are not aware of, leaving their ‘partner’ behind, and us in a
How to ask a question to a woman
Just so you know, lads. Interacting with females can be problematic. Women. Fickle things. Fickle, I tell you.
Our street lights are going out
So, I’m not against LED based lighting. Nearly every light in my home is now LED, and we even have strips of LEDs carefully stuck
Get that thermostat out of the hall!
What is this fascination with the hall of your house? Why do people want to put things in it? Yes, fine, if your hallway is
Automatically post your shit on Facebork and Twitter
Now, I am a little lazy, to be fair, when it comes to using social media. I don’t actually use Facebork or Twitter. Foolishly, I
Now we’re booming
Just Installed Two 12″ Subs In My Trunk
Can I get a free upgrade yet?
Erm, I wonder if I can get an upgrade to a Samsung Galaxy S5. I, er, accidentally dropped my S3. Honest. It just slipped out
But, This IS Liverpool
So, for some strange reason, the holier than thou brigade of Liverpool (most of whom don’t actually come from or live in Liverpool) are dissing
How the Global Warming scare began
This is nicely presented. I like John Coleman‘s style. The science is fine, can’t fault it. Not 100% sure about the history, but it seems
Smart Meters are spying on you
Smart Meters are being installed “for free” to British Gas customers, especially if they are dual fuel (gas and electricity) users. The conventional meters with
I done got me a tattoo, papa
So, I was thinking about tattoos. And, I thought I’d get an appropriate one. Would I LIE to you?
Are they about to tattoo us all?
One of the most frightening things happening in the UK is that more and more local authorities are collecting data on ethnic origin and sexual
‘Science’ shouldn’t be plonked alongside ‘environment’
When you put two words together into a phrase like “Love and Marriage” or “Horse and Carriage” you kind of expect them to actually somehow
Preparing a finger buffet
This is me being a dab hand in the kitchen. I’m preparing a finger buffet. I’m a really good cook, honest. The secret’s in the
How a lady uses a public toilet
International Women’s Day is coming soon. So I thought it was time for us men to find out more about what it’s like being a
Time for more guns on Liverpool’s streets
One of the charms of Liverpool is its gun crime. Guns are normally owned and used by the Scousers with sticky-out ears against other Scousers
Analogue clocks are favoured by mad people
I am not alone in not being able to understand these round things with shapes and a few numbers on that are supposed to tell
Going down the downpipe
When it rains, it really pisses down, ok?
Stop hyping old shite back into the charts, Three!
Three, please stop it. Okay, I loved the dancing pony last year. Four year old Socks was lovely as he moon-walked around Shetland. A real
This is Liverpool #TIL
There once was a sad ‘Towie‘ (The Only Way Is Essex) lookie-likeeeee ‘reality’ TV show called Desperate Scousewives. It bombed. Despite good photography of the
Resist Fracking in the UK: 10 reasons
Top ten reasons why we really must resist Fracking in Britain. They must Frack-Off. We are on to them! 10: Sinkholes. Fracking breaks up the
Now that’s what I call a memorial
Love or hate Nelson Mandela, this is clever. It’s a sculpture dedicated to him. At first glance it looks a bit odd. Almost like a
Please enter your new password
Please enter your new password: “cabbage” Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters. Please enter your new password: “boiled cabbage” Sorry, the password must
The Man-made Global Warming believers who want us dead
How much more ‘global warming‘ bullshit do they really think we can take without shouting at them? Surely even the most apathetic of minds must
The cruel and vindictive Scouse way
Just what is the cruel and vindictive Scouse way? When a son and a daughter lost their widowed mother to a stroke, many very young
Embarrassing Birthday Blues
Sigh. Today is my birthday. I hate my birthday. I can’t recall why I started hating my birthday. I can’t remember when I started hating
It’s time to stop using tins
What the heck are tins for? I mean, tins with food inside. Why have we still got them? Tins come from an era before we
Clinging to cliffs to change trains
We’ve all seen the dramatic pictures of the railway line at Dawlish in Devon, a section of which was left in mid-air once all the
When the weekend is the same old shite
School operates Monday to Friday, roughly from just before 9am and up until just after 3pm. School excludes Saturday and Sunday, making the ‘weekend’ something
Christianity is immoral, save our children
Statistically more Atheist marriages last longer than Christian marriages. God botherers are more likely to cheat on their partners and divorce than couples that are
We are very small and a long way away
A lot of people say that Christopher England is from another planet. I’ve no idea how they found out, but hey, humans miss out on
Keep them Birkenheaders out of Liverpool
For whatever reason it might be, there are two road tunnels under the River Mersey. They connect the centre of Liverpool with the foreign land
Can we ‘de-program’ the suicide bombers?
It happens all the time ‘over there’ yet recently, thank goodness, not so much ‘over here’. For now we are not being blown-up by suicide
Those embarrassing moments when
Do you ever suffer from those moments when something has happened or something has been said and you just want time to stop moving so
Scabs are good!
When teams of bullies surround a man going to work and scream “scab” at him, he can take solace in the knowledge that a scab
TV and radio in Liverpool
So, it’s 10 o’clock at night and you have arrived in Liverpool. How can you use TV and radio to get an idea or two
The Jesus and Mo saga
In 2005 ‘the Author‘ started producing the Jesus and Mo cartoons. Now, obviously it is against the rules of Islam, worthy of extreme death, to
One radio station for your life
Every decade or so, both BBC Radio 1 and BBC Radio 2 upset their cling-on audiences. Both stations have a remit as to whom they
Re-writing history Greenpeace style
Greenpeace is one of those organisations that employs thousands and somehow manages to be part of a multi-million Dollar industry that’s literally exploded around the
England's England 