Halloween. The culmination of Halloweek. This is the day that it’s very sadly illegal to answer the door with a real chainsaw. Instead, you have
Month: October 2014
Industry to be paralysed by the cold
We would be capable of supplying more than 100% of our electricity needs if we had just followed our noses and had allowed perfectly serviceable
Martian Sex
The year is 2214 and Charlie and Maureen land on Mars after accumulating enough Frequent Flyer miles. They meet a Martian couple and are talking about
Stock up with candles
So, it’s finally happened. We’ve got the preliminary warnings from various Government sources now. Britain is about to go dark. We are unable to generate
Chainsaws chase Christopher
A man just chased after me revving up the motor of a real chainsaw. A real chainsaw. Little girl twins just spoke to me in
Prayer in C
In recent times I’ve become slightly obsessed with Lilly Wood and the Prick. Well, to be more truthful, the single song “Prayer in C”, which,
The shamans hate our hair-dryers
The European Commission is a strange and mysterious ‘organisation’. Is it an ‘organisation’? I’m not exactly sure. It seems to be an unelected, at least
Why am I paying for other people to have children?
Yes. Why am I paying for other people to have children? I have a cat. Nobody pays for his vet bills. Nobody put money towards
Burn baby burn
So, sometimes the internets comes to gets you. Today is one of those days. The internets are reaching out to gets you. Hey, it’s kinda
Happy Halloweek and Christmas Quarter
This time of year is a strange time of year. You know the end of the year is signalled as soon as the X Factor
Cold calling for TalkTalk
So, my elderly neighbour is on TalkTalk for her phone, broadband and TV. She pays for all of this despite rarely using the broadband. The
What lies do you believe?
We grow up believing what we are told. From the start of our lives we are told about Father Christmas, The Tooth Fairy, God, and
Why’s Global’s Newsroom’s mention’s?
And cue: “From Global’s Newsroom, this is Christopher England with LBC News / Capital News / Heart News …” What? The normal, non-anorak listening public
The mating caves of pleasure
This British guy went to America and spent some time with Native Americans. Sadly, Native Americans tend to be rounded up and kept in otherwise
There will be no new Kenny Everett
I recently sighed and lamented the lack of ‘inclusive’ music radio (here). That’ll be music radio I can listen to and feel a part of,
The complete fishing rod experience
A little ol’ lady goes into a Fishing and Bait store to buy a rod and reel for her grandson’s birthday. She doesn’t know which one
Pop culture – Pop Music?
Here’s something I originally published over 10 years ago. I noticed that a re-publishing of it in 2008 was drawing traffic. Thus, I thought I’d re-publish
The Last Kiss
This is a disturbingly beautiful picture that’s been called ‘The Last Kiss’. The disturbing part is how it can, if you let it, represent the
The search for inclusive music radio
Was radio ever presented by human beings? Was it ever experimental? Did it ever take chances or dare to be different? Here`s my problem: I
Wot no Wi-Fi?
I’ve no idea why there’s some kinda interest in getting to Mars. Or indeed, to get to any of the other planets in our solar
Ebola comes to the UK
It’s strange, but not to be unexpected, that on social media and in real life (the two can be separate, y’know) the bets are on,
Look, the moon is not an egg, ok?
The new Doctor Who is great. I was in love with the Matt Smith Doctor Who. He came along just as the David Tennant Doctor
The last snigger about iPhones
Sooo. I promise I will stop my cruel and taunting behaviour toward iPhone users. Heck man, they know no better, and are not ready for
Open racism in the Guardian?
The Guardian ‘newspaper’ in the UK seems to be the acceptable face of racism and stereotyping. But why is it allowed to get away with
Quasar, the oldies radio station
Many years ago there was an offshore radio station called Radio Caroline. It stopped being an offshore radio station and became an internet radio station.
Facebork hates moving gifs
There was a temporary halt to Facebork being the murderer’s friend. For a short while they stopped publishing videos of human beings being tortured to
Ello and goodbye?
So, you remember Louise Mensch dontcha? The trendy Conservative MP who wrote racy books and then married the manager of the Red Hot Chilli Peppers.
The eyes have it
There are many different ways that you are being watched. Many different pairs of eyes. It’s a crazy world out there. If you can see
Life is…
Life is all the exciting bits you miss that go on without you because you are far too busy being a frustrated slave to your
A taste of early radio anoraksia netiquette
Time, as we all know, is a funny one. As is the internet. As is communication via the internet. As is radio. As is radio
September 2014 never happened
So, can you remember September 2014? You probably think you can, but those are planted memories. September 2014 never actually existed. However, humans love continuity,
England's England 