What a terrible day for my next door neighbour, Michelle. Poor Michelle.
Michelle broke the law and the law won.
You see, under the rules made for no logical reason by the lunatics that have taken over the asylum, Michelle was committing an illegal act. Michelle was vacuuming her carpet.
Suddenly, the SWOT team surrounded the house, broke the door down and came in shouting for Michelle to hit the floor.
Acting on information passed on to the law enforcement services from the special monitoring team at the Electricity Generating station, the SWOT team were there to establish how she was consuming 300 watts more than permitted.
Under EU directives, vacuum cleaners must not consume more than 1600 watts. To consume more is illegal! And from two years from now, it must not consume more than 900 watts.
Michelle’s illegal activity was her daring to use a vacuum cleaner that consumed 1900 watts. Heck, that’s 1,000 watts more powerful than they will be allowed to be. What on earth was she thinking??
Despite her having extremely clean and healthy looking carpets, she was breaking the law, and so deserved the 20 years of prison she was immediately sentenced to. I sneaked a photo of her illegal vacuum cleaner a few moments before it was crushed by the authorities.
England's England 
Did this actually even happen or are you just making up a hypothetical scenario? I understood the EU law only referred to the manufacture/sale of new models of vacuum cleaner. If this is true I suppose us using an old one inherited off my grandma is illegal then?
In short, I doubt this…
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One could argue the article is sarcastic satire making a point about the pointless laws handed down.
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