Now, that’s what I call a Phat burger


So, this has to be the best ever, extremely healthy, burger.  Indeed, it is the Phat Burger.

The Phat Burger, probably named as a parody after thin people like myself, is extremely healthy. There’s a bit of rocket or kale or some other green thing on the bottom.  Then onions. That’s all very healthy vegetables, innit. The onions are covered in a very yummy barbecue sauce.

On top of the onions are some honey-glazed bacon strips. Now, being produced by a Halal establishment, this, of course, is not actual bacon.  The words ‘bacon’ and ‘ham’ always refer to turkey. Which is odd, because until there was only Halal meat available in takeaways, I’d never heard of ‘turkey ham’ or ‘turkey bacon’.  Yet, that’s all we can get now because of the Muslim and Jewish fear of the pig.

Anyway, the honey-glazed ‘bacon’ strips were absolutely lovely and tasty.

On top of them was a very thick cut of prime beef burger.  Very tasty. Yum!

On top of the burger, more ‘bacon’, then a huge massive piece of chicken.  Huge. Double yum!

So, topping the chicken is not one but two fried eggs. Count them. One, two. That’s treble yum that is.

And on top of the eggs, more strips of pretend ‘bacon’, and then a very soft fresh bun.

So, there you have it.  That’s the Phat Burger from Archies in Liverpool that I just ate.


I topped it off with a drink called The Devil.  I could tell you about The Devil, but I’d have to kill you.