McDonald’s takes a fresh turn

Well, this is interesting, innit.

McDonald’s restaurants are closing across the country.

Now, that’s a thought that will excite the eco-warriors who have been indoctrinated with strange ideas about how McDonald’s meals are the food of the anti-Christ.

Actually, they hide their hatred of success and ‘capitalism’ behind false stories about the quality of the food.  They pretend it is unhealthy. Why do they do that? Oh yeah, it’s because they are eco-warriors in an eco-war with normal humanity.

The truth is that McDonald’s have hygiene standards that are far superior to most restaurants, and the meals they serve use top rated ethically grown English and Irish produce. All the calories and nutritional information of everything is published, and eating an occasional McDonald’s meal is extremely healthy.  And definitely so, compared to some of the other smaller ‘takeaways’ around the country.

Anyway, sorry about this McDonald’s haters and eco-warriors, but here’s a fact that’s going to have you rolling another spliff in order to try to cope with: McDonald’s restaurants are re-opening!

Yep, sorry about that, but they are re-opening with an exciting modernisation.

Most importantly, the point where you order your food is different to the point where you collect your food.  It’s all gone a bit like Argos.

You order and pay for your food and you get a receipt with a number on it.  You waddle to the Collection Point and wait watching the screen as your number works its way to the top. In view and right in front of you, you can watch as your meal is cooked and assembled by a troupe of workers touching only food and not money or any of the front of house stuff they used to have to.  They can concentrate on freshly preparing your meal. Gone are the trays full of pre-prepared burgers and meals gong stale.  Everything is super-fresh and instant.

Even more exciting for people like me who hate having to interface with humans, you don’t even have to talk to anybody to order your meal.  If you prefer you can use a touch screen machine. Tap at a few icons in order to pick and create the meal you are after, tap your credit card, and whoosh your order is made. Take the receipt and wait at the Collection Point.  Heck, this too is exactly the same as Argos!

Yum. Hungry now. I’m off for a feature burger with a side of melon chunks and an Oasis.