Category: Uncategorized

Christopher England: Am I hearing right that “Caroline Mattress” (the friendly nickname for a bunch of guys playing records and using the call-sign “Radio Caroline”

Is this country top-heavy with moaning old farts? I think so. No wonder the younger generation feel so isolated and under-valued. It seems that anybody

As Christopher England I have made quite a number of enemies over the years. Usually, these ‘enemies’ are people who fall into two distinct camps.

Them: You sound muffled. Me: Muffled? Them: Yeah! Really quiet and like you are talking from behind a blanket. Me: I’m just talking normally as

Me: Hi. I’ve a few things I’m after. Firstly, I’d like to buy a watch Shop assistant: Analogue? Me: No, just a watch. I’d also

Come on now. This is all some huge joke, right? Now the Controller of Radio 2 has fallen on her sword. Poor Andrew Sachs was

I love WordPress, but the nature of my needs are now more suited to tumblr.com so I’ve moved there. Please come on over to my

Christopher England is a kinda personality or persona of another Chris, and mainly nothing like him. That other Chris is sooooooo damn busy being himself

Do you remember that mega-worry about minute particles of the illegal dye Sudan I getting into the food chain? Man, was that fun to watch.

Cor blimey. How is a man supposed to sleep around here, eh? That big moon thing keeps shining brightly. Ok, so it’s my fault for

To different people, the same word will have different meanings.

Why are some people weird? It’s usually purely down to the poisons they either unknowingly or knowingly ingest.

It’s my brother’s 50th birthday today. It’s extremely odd to think back, say, 40 years to when he was ten and we were children living

I read with interest about the world’s oldest man. As I get older and start to wonder at what point I am likely to wake

Having previously reported on the horror of daytime shopping in supermarkets, there is a side issue I need to address. It’s about the confused signals.

Okay, I’m getting to grips with this shopping lark, but I am suffering from trolley rage.

I read this somewhere ages ago, and I thought it was pretty thought-provoking, so I’ve plagiarised it for here from my copy that’s on my

I sat down to watch the guy who is better known for playing the dense and daft Baldrick in the various Blackadder series, to see

Peter Sutcliffe, the Yorkshire Ripper, brutally murdered 13 women over a four year period, horribly mutilating their bodies, and was later diagnosed as a paranoid

So today we had an eclipse of the moon. In fact it’s doing its stuff right now as I, er, write. Currently it’s a sort

The Swastika is a lovely symbol. It means a lot to a lot of people, and yet there are those who want it banned. This

Ikea is a ‘Scandinavian’ self-assembly furniture shop. Well, it’s lots of shops. Huge shops. They are making an absolute fortune for the owners, because somehow

I see that football appears to be infesting TV again. Live and let live, but I’ve never understood games with balls. Well, some of them

So what’s all this shaving tiny bits out of your eyebrows business, eh?

I got to hear the news today that a girl working for a company I have a relationship with (the company not the girl), was

Satire is a wonderful thing. The satirical writers of our world make us laugh by pointing at those who should be laughed at. Satire isn’t

Maybe that goldfish is trying to tell you his name is Bob.

I think the sport of streaking first started in the 1970s. This was the completely harmless yet completely pointless activity of taking all one’s clothes

Good to hear that Ireland has removed all the silly imperial road signs spouting stuff like ‘miles per hour’ speed limits and has properly replaced

In conversation, I very very occasionally drop into the discussion that I am 19 years of age (Ok, I actually say it a lot). This

I realise that Valentine’s Day is a hype. It is a device used to generate profit for those who publish and sell cards. And those

As a small science experiment yesterday, I decided to kidnap somebody. Well, it wasn’t just yesterday. I’d been planning it for a little while, and

It’s the day after my birthday, and so I’ve called this journey to my next birthday the year of the cat. I am determined that

I’ve noticed this weird old woman walking about. She’s sort of passed me a few times. She’s walking with a bit of a hobble, and

The Passage of Time: Time and time again I hear people discussing how fast time seems to be going. They have a whole range of

This might be a true story. I hate socialising. I hate people. But, my girlfriend and I went out with friends the other night to

In the dark and distant days of the beginning of digital mobile telephony, I remember Orange had introduced a new phone that included the ability

I dunno. That Professor Stephen Hawkin, eh? He’s a one. I mean, right, the information paradox that has blighted debates for over 30 years, yeah?

Words. Everywhere. They are trying to get us. To overwhelm us. To make us never forget them. Are we in danger? Yes we are.

Phew! Christmas is over for another year, and my eyes can stop watering.

Ok, I see a danger here. It’s just the mood I’m in as I spout this stuff, but you read the first few entries on

I’m a radio anorak.  There.  I’ve said it.  But, I’m not just that.  Let’s see how blogging helps me prove something, eh?