I walked nearly 5 kilometres (just over 3 miles) the other day. No biggie. I decided to reward myself with a sit down with a huge (Why can’t they call it ‘huge’ instead of this stupid ‘Venti’ word?) Hot Chocolate in Starbucks. It is truly one of the best versions of Hot Chocolate available to human kind.
As I sat there musing over how the cost of most drinks in Starbucks (or any ‘coffee house’) take those on minimum wage about half an hour’s work in order to be able to pay for, I realised I was being subjected to the most awful and depressingly dirgey ‘unknown artist’ being played not too discretely over the PA system.
This particular Starbucks is opposite Liverpool’s main hospital. Convenient, I mused; have a heart attack from drinking too much coffee and just get carried across the road to the Emergency department. Sorted.
I realised I was feeling a little depressed at this thought, and so began to focus on the awful singing and music of the ‘featured artists’ coming out of the PA system. Yep, it was making me feel the need to consider my own death.
OH MY GOD!
What if I was to have a heart attack and die right there, right at that moment? My last experience from existence would be hearing this god-damn awful song and singer. The soundtrack of my dying moments would be the worst music and singing ever.
I left the premises.
However, the experience has got me thinking. A lot of people who are terminally ill will pick their favourite albums or songs to play during their final moments. That is extremely sad, but I assume comforting and is something they feel in control of even if they can do nothing about their shuttling off this mortal coil.
Yes. If you know you are about to die, you can pick the soundtrack of your last moments. However, with a heart attack or stroke or whatever it may be that just suddenly happens, you don’t really get a chance to stop for a few moments and move an mp3 player to the ‘In case of death’ playlist.
This thought of what might be playing as I die has now been haunting me for a while. I may have mentioned I tend to hate oldies, especially those that get played on the radio over and over again. I do get exposed to them a lot in different places, so I now worry whenever I hear one that if I feel whatever the signs of a heart attack might be, part of my response is to leap into the road or wherever I need to, in order to get away from the old songs.
This fear seems to have compounded my hatred of oldies. Put me in a shop or place where oldies are playing and I now begin to sweat.
Anyway. Have a think. What would be the worst music ever to be playing during your own dying moments?
I hope I haven’t made you paranoid.
England's England 