Devotees turn Radio Caroline into a joke

I’m not sure who believes that Radio Caroline is actually a legend.  It self-proclaims that it is, but I worry that the ever more bizarre of its followers are not in fact alienating normal people from experiencing this ‘legend’ or taking it seriously.

The phrase “Radio Caroline” reminds even those who weren’t actually listeners, of half a century ago when the radio DJ was important and the only place to find new music was to listen patiently through all else that happened via a tiny handful of radio stations. However, today is very different.

Today’s Radio Caroline is lost in a sea of billions of internet radio stations of every single flavour catering for every single need, and it elects to stick to playing rock oldies to reflect an era when rock oldies were the newies of the day that it was championing. It is also one of the hundreds of stations delivered by satellite. It is competing with play on demand services offering the listener the ability to fast forward or rewind as standard so they no longer have to listen to the rubbish waiting for the cream. Indeed, it’s also competing with the iPod or personal mp3 player.

For the general public today’s Radio Caroline means nothing, and they certainly don’t appear to be listening to it either.  The only listeners are the extreme ‘anoraks’ who have devoted their life to following and supporting the station simply because it bears the name of something that for a few short years was a small but integral part of their childhood.

The hard core of Caroline devotees, all but a tiny few now carrying their free bus passes, carry on a bit like Scientologists on acid in defence of anything Radio Caroline.  The Caroline cult is probably more dangerous than conventional religious cults because it has no set of rules and rituals to bind the devotee.  Well, that’s not exactly true, of course, because they can pour their cash into Caroline if they so wish, just as others might fill the collection plate of any religious institution they’ve elected to devote themselves to.

For whatever the historical reason might be, the ‘legend’ that was Radio Caroline is nothing beyond the memories of what it once was.  However, this is not a sentence that one can utter too loudly because, as when one disses the Scientologists, there’s always a slightly unhinged devotee waiting to hiss and spit and make life hell.

So too it is with Radio Caroline.  The devotees will self-elect to spend time hounding anybody not believing, as they unquestioningly do, that Radio Caroline is the best thing since sliced bread with divine qualities (not that I’ve ever tasted sliced bread with divine qualities).

Even within the Caroline devotion there are factions who believe the current incarnation is God herself speaking, and they are at war with those who feel the current incarnation is an imposter, or lost its bottle by no longer being at sea and so therefore is not the real Radio Caroline.  The arguments about this often become quite a bitch-fest.  Had the participants any, all would be holding tufts of their opponents’ hair.

Over the last decade, the amount of Caroline devotees has dwindled.  I blame death or the near death experiences that render a person incapacitated and unaware of the day of the week, etc.  However, at the same time those that are left have become more outraged and angry and, with veins popping out of their eyeballs, they patrol the internet from their commodes looking for people to bark at.  Via Facebook or the few remaining steam-radio fora available they will attack anybody not toeing the party line.

Toeing the party line when it comes to matters Caroline is somewhat difficult.  As I mentioned before, there is no structure or set of rules given out by Radio Caroline itself, just the rules that are inside the heads of its defenders as they shout and scream via the ‘net at anybody disagreeing with those rules inside their head.

However, even an innocent well meant question or statement from ordinary people can trigger one of these outbursts, and this is where the damage to things Caroline comes.

Radio Caroline, it appears, is campaigning for a broadcasting licence to play rock oldies to parts of Kent (I’ve spoken of this before here), and so it is slightly in the limelight and mixing with normal people.

Unfortunately, this is a bit dangerous because all the normal people out there are getting to see the madness that circles around Caroline like unchained Rottweilers foaming at the mouth.

Not only do these devotees attack anybody who may have a different take on the history of offshore radio, but they publicly say the most embarrassing things.  Already on an open Facebook page supposedly focussing on the licence bid they are mixing their fawning love of anything to do with Caroline with some pretty outrageous ideas and statements.  So far this has included the buying out of the Heart FM network in order to broadcast across the UK, the forming of a co-operative, and using transmitters in Holland, or maybe Sweden, or how they’ve listened to Caroline every day since 1964, it would be better if it came from a ship, the ship should go back to sea, bla bla bla.

Would anybody normal seeing this do anything other that quietly click the ‘back’ button and whistle uncomfortably?

Further, via one remaining forum outside of Facebook (the “Garry Steven’s Pirate Radio Board”), a tiny number of Caroline devotees using multiple names to hide themselves from being identified, will outrageously attack previous employees of Radio Caroline, sneer and snarl at any ideas or thoughts that don’t fit in with their own, and even resort to ridiculing the original founder of Caroline, Ronan O’Rahilly, for no longer being a part of it.

On the face of it, these childish outbursts amount to nothing much more than cyber-bullying in a playground of old men, of course, but with Radio Caroline trying to lift its profile and so be considered worthy of being handed a licence, the casual onlooker might be somebody important.

Radio Caroline is lobbying MPs and wants to be taken seriously.  But it does nothing to try to quieten the, for want of a better description, raving mad people who think it is an actual living entity (a ‘lady’) incapable of doing any wrong.

Nothing that I have described adds to the charm of Radio Caroline.  All it does is remove credibility and reinforces the valid point that the whole thing is a joke and so shouldn’t be taken seriously.

I am told that as far as the authorities are concerned, Radio Caroline is a sole trader, Peter Moore, and he is surrounded by devotees who put the radio station together without payment.  I am sure that the ‘inner core’ of these volunteers are doing their best for what they believe in. Good for them.

However, the damage is coming from these raving mad hangers-on who are outside of the camp and are the first thing people see when looking at things Radio Caroline, and why nobody will be throwing a broadcasting licence at this joke any time soon unless they can be rounded up and put on a leash to keep them from biting passers-by.

Until that happens, it is these very devotees that are completely killing Caroline.  Now, that’s just got to be weird, hasn’t it?  I bet they don’t even appreciate the damage they are causing, and will immediately blame one of the other factions.