I don’t watch much TV overall, although there’s some pretty hot and interesting stuff on Channel 4 now and again, but I did watch Britain’s Got Talent tonight by mistake.
Hmmm. Another programme with three judges and an act being thrown off each week by the public (although one being saveable by the judges). What a fantastic concept for a programme. Not. When will this ever end? Why is everything on TV this format?
Yes, I realise the whole thing is really just a vehicle for finding another recording star (‘cos the finalist is always going to be a singer and never a juggler) for Simon Cowell’s record company to make Simon Cowell Billions of Dollars out of, but there’s a bit I don’t get…
Why do we have to have the sob stories? People are either bullied at school, had their entire family eaten by termites, or, as in tonight’s programme, have some how been forced to leave their children in the Philippines whilst they seek work over here as a club singer in order to send money back to them.
Oh, come on. Stop it with the bloody sob stories. Why didn’t this women bring her kids over with her? Everybody else does! And why didn’t she try to get a real job instead of thinking the answer to her financial problems would be to audition for singing contests? (OK, it’s not officially a singing contest, although we all know it is.) She could have got some training and maybe got a reasonably well-paid office job or something, got a little flat and lived quite securely with her kids. But no. She wants to do the sobbing on a talent show bit instead. And worse, singing bloody annoying Whitney Houston songs to boot.
Here’s a slightly better format for this winning formula programme: As soon as somebody has a sob story they should immediately hear three buzzing noises, the stage trapdoor should open, they plummet down ending their obvious misery in life, and we never ever see or hear of them again. They should then be replaced by a contestant who wants to use only their talent to win the show, not emotional blackmail.
England's England 
how can you possibly watch britains got talent “by mistake”? was it some sort of intellectual accident, or were you just succuming to the mass madness? Not like you, Chris. Every now and again, I, by accident, read your musings, so it’s nothing to unduly worry about. (Getting the hang of this ‘ere fangled gadget, now). Still, it must be nice for you to know that you can still raise a smirk, even after all these years! Can you tell me what this jaiku/twitter is? Don’t see much about it down ‘ere in pastyland. Take care, me ‘andsome!
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by the by, I really like your slotty foto fing at the top of your page, well cool, nice one. Funny, I recognised the chin even though I’d never really seen it afore ( in all its splendour).
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How to watch a tv show by mistake: Be in a place where it’s on being eagerly consumed by most of the others around you. Seems rude to make a fuss, scream, cry, or walk out. Instead you just watch, dontcha.
And, hey, them be my lips, not me chin, matey.
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